After a long and wonderful week at Tin House, I drove up from Portland after the last day of the conference so Vasant and I could see one of our favorite bands together, Streetlight Manifesto. I had left the workshop that afternoon a bit earlier than I planned to because we had just gotten heartbreaking news about a loved one’s sudden passing. Vasant had a friend drive him down I-5 so we could meet halfway and be together sooner.
After everything that’s happened these last six weeks, and especially on Saturday, we almost cancelled our concert plans to stay home. I was exhausted, he was grieving—staying home would’ve been a legitimate response to all of this. Ultimately, we decided to push through the tiredness and grief and be with people we love in a place we loved, and Streetlight concerts are some of the most loving, earnest shows. It was a joy to be there, more than half the people seemed to need it as badly as we did.
But this has been a theme in life lately—pushing though things when they’re mind-numbingly hard—I almost didn’t go to Tin House because of Dad’s post-op issues and everything in June that led up to his open heart surgery. Now, when I was done there, I did take some afternoons off to rest. A bunch of us from the workshop went into the forest outside downtown on Thursday to hike around and wow, was that needed.
But apart from those tiny breathers, the last six weeks have been about taking a deep breath and jumping into the next thing, one after another.
Tin House was an amazing week of writing, making new friends, getting into stories, and there was even a film screening for our documentary at the end of the week. The concert was one of the best shows I’ve ever seen (it was my first time at a concert masked up—it’s a different experience belting out songs into a KN-94). Dad’s doing well in his recovery, and even the things that are difficult there are expected.
I’m happy and grateful (and so incredibly exhausted) after all these experiences in the midst of some truly weird times—the line from the song in this video “and when you wake up, everything’s gonna be fine. I guarantee that you’ll wake in a better place, in a better time…” has been my driving lyric for these last six weeks (as it has been at other tough times in my life).
Today, I fully felt that, like a promised fulfilled. It feels like a different season of life started at this show—I’m excited to get into it, and into all the stories (film and written) that are waiting on the other side.
